i love my puppyyyyy.
just to let you all know. ;]

I'm over the cliches.
I'm over the stereotypes.
I'm most likely over you.
All I want is a lip ring, and some hookah.
My life will be complete then.

And I really think I'm done eating.
For good.
I'm so sick of EVERYTHING.
& EVERYBODY.
It's not even funny anymore.

People are assholes.
And really don't know how to take a hint.
HMMMMM?
kthnx.
Fuckkkkk itttttttttt.

I'm so over caring what people think. And I'm over being stressed out and depressed over something this stupid. I should be used to it, because it's not like this is the first time this has happened. But no.

The past 2 weeks have been the prologue to what I think will be my next disaster. The way I'm being treated by certain people, and the things going on in my life concerning issues that hardly anyone knows about, is really just too much to handle along with the other stressful stuff going on.

Saturday was so amazing because it got me away from everything. Just for one night, I was able to be myself, and no one was there to judge. And I can't wait for it to happen again. The feeling is so great, and just how I remember it. Always able to make me laugh. Always able to bring me out of my dreadful emotions.

It's tough walking around telling everybody a lie. Do I like to do it? No. But I feel that I have to. I'm not sure why, because I'm not the only one, but I feel that I need to keep it all inside. If it weren't for the few, very select people, I would have probably have seen you at my grave. And that's what scares me.

I'm so sick of hiding everything. I hate having secrets that I can't tell anyone. And I especially hate how far apart it makes me feel to my closest friends. I really just want to tell the world, but I'm still having problems telling myself. I think a change needs to happen, hopefully sooner rather than later.

lol.

=]

...confusing. I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Ever since Sunday night when I watched "Summer Storm", I haven't felt the same. I think it has something to with with how the movie pretty much hit me in the face with the reality of my life.If you've ever seen it, I'd think you'd understand. It just has me thinking so much. About life, and about myself as a person. It's time for me to just sit down, think things over thoroughly and come to a decision. If any of you have ever seen that movie, I think you know what i'm talking about. And if you know what I'm talking about, I could really use some help. This is one of the toughest things in life that someone can go trough, and of course it's happening to me.

So someone, if anyone's listening, help me.

High School Musical is so good! I LOVE IT. I advise everyone to go rent it and watch it. It's sooooooo great! =] <3

......................................................95.9 is playing Merry Christmas by NSYNC.

haha.

My LJ is getting pretty sappy and emo, isn't it?







I've come to a conclusion. I have been living my life as a lie for the past 3 or 4 months. In January 2006, my life started to unravel and my true feelings came out. I spoke my opinions and I didn't care who heard them or how they felt about it. But then I tried to make a drastic change so the ones closest to me would, in a way, 'accept' me. Well, in the past week, I've become more and more pissed that everyone around me knows only lies and not the truth about me. I guess it's my fault. I shouldn't have changed myself for people. I'm going to be more opinionated, more open, more truthful. And if people don't like it, well then I don't like them.

OUT.

You know what pisses me off?
Knowing what you want to do with your life, but knowing that you can't fulfill those dreams.
Knowing that everything you've tried to do to make your future how you want it, doesn't matter.
I know I'm still years away from even needing to think about a career. But I have goals. Goals that seem so far out of reach, a spaceship couldn't get to them.


Maybe I should audition for MADE. They seem to be able to do anything.

I'm thinking....

bonfire.

soon.


=]

i basically have no life.
 whurrr my friendlies at?
lez do sumtinnnnnnnnnnn.



fer real. my mom lectured me about how i have no life and how i need friends to do stuff with. so uh, its pretty bad. >=-(  maybe if it will stop raining for more thatn 20 seconds, and my yard can dry out, i might plan another bonfire.  but in the meantime. call me. i need to do something. AND SO DO YOU. so lets. =)

new account biatchessssss.
needed to get rid of the old one.
NEEDED. so, here it is.